Splitting The Nice Atom

Nice- It seems too often it is the conciliatory adjective used to describe a person of lack luster personality or used as a synonym for not so attractive. I believe myself to have a fair dose of both attractiveness and personality. I do also believe however that the first word that would pop into someone's head when I am called to mind is nice.

I could let my ego take some misguided offense but I have come- at this very moment actually after having just slowed down to help a non-English speaking woman to the F train even though I was in a rush- that nice isn't such a bad thing to be.

It seems like such a benign almost impotent word but as the sun shone down on second avenue and 3rd street and a man in his van said, "Hi baby," instead of walking by with blinders on, I waved and offered a "Hey" and a smile back. It was the nice thing to do.

Don't get me wrong. I am not a sticky sweet Mary Sunshine, far from it. And I don't consider those people to be so nice but rather suffering from a personality disorder.

What I do believe is that true niceness comes from having a caring and respect for others and no, not all the time, that's impossible, but most of the time. Not something that seems to be valued much as a character trait anymore as we walk around with our headphones on or texting on our blackberries because honestly, why bother to pick up the phone if you don't have to?

Maybe this technology that connects us all is causing a huge disconnect in society and this insular/isolationist quality to the whole thing makes being nice the same way- why do it if you don't have to?

I'm sure most grandmothers would be turning in their graves if they saw me as I sit on this surprisingly empty train tapping away at the berry keys, thankful for having a device to record my thoughts. I am seemingly more self absorbed than ever but somehow I still manage to be nice.